When Time Outs don't Work

Sometimes all the best advice you've been given simply doesn't work for your kid. I know that. You know that. It's life.

Discipline is one example. To be effective, a mode of discipline has to take a child out of their head. It has to sort of shock them. Well, shock may be a bad word-- let's say unsettle. The child has to realize what they are doing is wrong, and the consequence has to be enough to (hopefully) dissuade them from doing it again. For example, take time outs. They work for a lot of kids, but not for all. Sometimes being put in a quiet spot just isn't enough of a consequence. One mother told me today of how she deals with her spirited little girl. When M. gets too excited, her MeanMommy puts her toys in a time out. I think that's brilliant. It's all about looking for the right button to push that lets your child know what they did was unacceptable. Sometimes it's a time out. Sometimes it's putting their toys in time out. For some it's not letting them do an activity with you that they were really looking forward to. Whatever the button is, you'll know it when you find it.

I'd love to hear about what works (or doesn't) for you.